Mainstay Mondays Number One: Misogyny? I Barely Know Her!
July 23rd, 2012
So this is like watching paint dry I'm sure. The whole roll out of my layout, I mean. It's been over the course of what, six months or so since I started this little plan of mine? "Throwback Thursdays," "What's Up Wednesdays?" Well here we are with "Mainstay Mondays" now. And, just like with all the other firsts for a given category, I'll give a brief overview of what to expect from this particular topic.
"Mainstay Mondays" are generally for all those thoughts the float around my mind. What makes it so special or for the sake of argument, special enough to warrant the title "mainstay" is that these ideas will flow along the terms of what this site was originally created for. "Mental spring cleaning." Just new content that's not as personal as my WtUpWeds or as dated as the ThrThurs. So, without further adieu, here is the "first" entry in the category.
Misogyny? I Barely Know Her!
Misogyny is a term that pretty much dictates the hatred of women. Don't believe me? Click the link. It goes to dictionary dot com or some other reference guide other than wikipedia. So what right? What's the big deal? Well the big deal is that this isn't going to be some long trite peace trying to express how I don't fall into such a category but rather a long trite peace about how there're plenty of great reasons why I should. And, not only that but also how the female presence in my life in particular has all but groomed me to be so. Welcome to the Misogyny-Made Man. (Part I)
Growing up, there was always an infinite abyss of differing views and opinions but to such an extent that it was impossible to realize. That being said, there really are more people in this world than one can imagine at any age. There just always seems to be some aspect of life that continually reaffirms the miniscule nature of self and its place in existence. Now, I have little desire to dive too deeply into philosophy with this but a lot does fall upon the very nature of sentience, what that truly means in relation to existence.
So, then how does that build the misogynist? Simple, add equal parts inferiority complex, mass media portrayal and propaganda, then countless interactions with others groomed in similar fashion to believe the belittlement of their worth dare bring happiness and there you go! Now, this is perhaps where things get a bit convoluted. I do apologize but as it's mainstay I can't help if this begins to bleed into topics I've covered in the past and even ones I've yet to cover here.
Personally speaking, I greatly enjoy the idea of being with a woman. As time continues to move forward however, I've found myself becoming, for lack of a better term, more and more picky about just what type of woman it would be. I am by no means the greatest specimen of humanoid. In fact aside from countless bouts of discrimination, inadequacies, and underestimations I've found isolation to be the only calming and stress-free existence available at this time. Though as the Last Order dictates, my mission will not be possible in such a state so, interaction, no matter how stressing, is an unavoidable reality. So, what's so bad about interaction? What's so hard to deal with? Simple, people suck.
Let me reiterate, it is the negative interactions that color this world. Why it seems those are the most prevalent only helps to produce the traits that fall in line with a recluse. "Be confident" is a term that gets thrown around casually. The desire for a "Real Man" instead of a "Boy" gets equal play as well. Vague idioms that carry as much weight as "Be happy" would went thrown to someone suffering from chronic depression. Of all the sayings I've come across in my time, it is two that stick with me in this field of study. "Good guys finish last" and "It takes money to make money,"
"Good guys finish last" is a saying that used to hold a lot of meaning for me. I would take it to heart to explain my inadequacies in dealing with people and situations in which I felt I should be able to be on equal footing but alas would find myself falling to the wayside. It can make someone quite bitter to always fail at something everyone around them seems to excel at, and with such ease, but the truth is that, even THAT such limitation can be surpassed. To tweak the saying a bit, as life continued on it really seemed to ring true. Hearing women's reasoning for turning me down as being because I was "too nice" couldn't possibly do little else but reaffirm the previous statement. Women talk about how it's not "dicks" and "douche bags" but the "confidence" then make the previous explored comment and settle on people who very much treat them poorly can hardly be seen as little more than the hypocrisy so readily evident in this world. But even then, to hold fast to the original quote means to find contention in the stagnation that such a belief entails. But that's merely the female portion. What of the male?
Men will spew out words of similar faction. Truth be told though, their "truth" is that which is equally as faulty. The ones that find success are always quick to ridicule those that hold fast to that undelying principle of those who "finish last." They have succeeded where so many others have failed and say that such isn't the case which really is possibly the truth. Now we see the evolution. They aren't all "not nice guys" that are finishing. They are those that don't lack what others do. So the quote changes. It's not about nice guys or bad guys but a matter of those with the tools to continue that finish. First. And where are those tools? How does one acquire such? Simple, interaction which brings us to the second quote.
"You need to spend money to make money." That is, of the two, the better quote. Experience in anything goes a long way. But it is the negative experiences in life that produce such jaded existences. At this point in time I find myself burdened by two alternative. To settle on something short of my aspirations or to holdfast and steady in the hope that eventually the moment of truth will be upon me. Sounds a bit dreary no? But it is the truth. We can all be passive or active in our fates and though it may sound as though that is what those alternatives are about, such couldn't be further from the truth. The alternatives are about reality. And the reality that I'm positive that so many people have come to realize themselves. There are too many out there that are brainwashed into being the stereotype that those true individuals are withering away and at great speeds. I've personally come into contact with enough of the unsavory to, in my opinion, sate a lifetime. Women who care solely about appearance or wealth/possessions. But where and what happened to those individuals, those strong and independent who were actually as those words designate?
I am not financially wealthy or good looking. It is something I've come to terms with long ago. As such, I strive to accomplish that which I feel I was destined to accomplish. That said, I will not settle. I will not settle for those that message me because they've ascertained what I do for a living and see the potential in it to make their lives better. I will not settle on those who hold the branch of friendship (online) but then talk about how a membership and some money would "help" you two become closer. I will not settle on those who turn their noses because I do not own a car. I will not settle on those who don't fit my idea person but have shown interest in me otherwise. I will settle for the one who embodies the strength I know all humans to have and if that takes a lifetime or a hundred, that is the price I'm willing to put on the line. I find no beauty in those who lack honesty in their desires. I struggle with such on a regular basis but at the end of the day, I know exactly what I am, what I'm here to do, and that if I'm skeptical it's because I've seen it all before. So, until I see otherwise, just understand that it isn't misogyny. It isn't anti-feminist. It is the fact that there is better. There is the best. And that is where I settle. Nothing short of that could possibly do me any good.
Now I know this post is probably an odd way to start off with but later posts in this series will make a bit more sense in tandem with it. Thanks for the read though if you were able to make it this far and I hope that you'll be willing to offer some feedback because as I've already stated above and will state a million more times, interaction is absolutely necessary. Thank you again, and yeah, I guess, go save the world, there can never be too many heroes.